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Wednesday 17 December 2014

There's Always Next Year? What About The Rest Of This Year?

All kids want to do is sit inside and read. They need to go outside and be kids. When I was a boy, I found a cork tied to a piece of string and I entertained myself for weeks. Kids are rotting their minds with words and getting lost in places that exist only in pages. I weep for this generation.

-S. Mark Twain- while he was briefly sober but still extremely racist.

 

Portions of the following not affecting the outcome of the article, may have been edited. Any comments made by the reporter regarding his affiliation with any athlete or celebrity, if deceased or otherwise, were fabricated for educational purposes only.

-Lawyer guy who accidentally said the "N" word during the OJ Simpson Trial

 

The Oakland Raiders have not had stability at the head coaching position since big hair and power ballads. Starting in 1969 through the beginning of the season in 1989 John Madden, Tom Flores and Mike Shanahan were the only head coaches the Raiders ever had. Those three coaches have combined for a career close to 400 wins. Suddenly in 1989, during the middle of the season, Mike Shanahan was fired after a 1-3 start. A season record that The 2008 New York Giants were inches away from, nearly losing to the Redskins in week three. That was the same year they beat the undefeated Patriots in the Super Bowl. The dismissal of Shanahan began an ugly and impatient trend that continues well into 2014. Raiders owner, Al Davis hired retired offensive lineman, Art Shell to be the next head coach of the team. Shell went on to have a fair amount of wins during the regular season as well as playoff success but was fired after posting another winning record in 1994.

--Incumbent Coach (Mike Shanahan) OAKLAND: 1 year+ /20 Wins

--Interim Coach (Art Shell) OAKLAND: 5 years/54 Wins

 

Unfortunately, Mike Shanahan lived to coach again (1995-2008)

 

--Coach (Mike Shanahan) DENVER: 14 years/138 Wins

--(Combined Coaching Record) OAKLAND: 14 years/92 Wins

 

The next mid season coaching change for The Silver and Black came in 2008. It was at this time I truly began to believe that Al Davis made a pact with Satan after he won the 1983 Superbowl. Less than 2 years after hiring Lane Kiffin, the coach began to faced accusations ranging from disputes regarding staff and blatant lying to the organization. After Kiffin was relieved of his duties in 2008, the ensuing press conference shed some light on a historic (literally) franchise. Watching an elderly man hold a meeting for the press and using an overhead projector that was made circa 1978, can be a difficult sight in the 21st century. Soon the dust settled on the termination of Kiffin. Davis then sued Kiffin for monetary retribution. Everyone knows the old saying, "You may be able to beat the Raiders on the football field, but you will never beat them in court." Eventually, TOM CABLE another former offensive lineman/coach was hired by The Raiders.

 

-Incumbent Coach (Lane Kiffen) Oakland: 1+ year/5 Wins

-Interim Coach (Tom Cable) Oakland: 2+ years/21 Wins

 

History repeated itself during the 2014 season under Dennis Allen. This year's team has endured the lowest of lows and the lowest of highs. One of the low-highs, was the dismissal of Dennis Allen. While on his way out he received the customary "I Coached the Oakland Raiders and All I Got Was This Crappy T-Shirt"

If Dennis Allen gave a press conference on Dennis Allen:

"He had some opportunities to execute but just didn't get it done. At the end of the day, players weren't in position to make plays and when you don't win the turnover battle it is hard to close out football games." I think the other team played phenomenal and executed their game plan. We are going to get better and be prepared to make better plays because at the end of the day, it's all about making plays"

Dennis was replaced this season by a offensive line coach Tony Sparano. He is the new interim coach for the season. Sparano has gone par for the course at best. After the Raiders got off to a 0-4 start and nobody is shocked about them rolling into week 16 at 2-12. If Sparano somehow managed to finish his last two games with a victory, it would be very reminiscent of how Tom Cable got to keep his job at the end of his interim stint. It also cannot be forgotten that with a little time and patience, Tom Cable coached the Raiders to their first non losing record in seven years.. Media outlets at the time of this writing are reporting a full scale demolition of the Raiders orchestrated by Mark Davis and sparing no expense. I wonder if the candidates being interviewed for the general manager or head coaching sport will be subjected to "The McDonald's Test." If you don't know what that is Ask Sean Payton.

--Incumbent Coach (Dennis Allen) Oakland: 2+ years/8 Wins

--Interim Coach (Tony Sparano) Oakland: 0+ years/2 Wins


*Final Thought 
Sparano may coach in Oakland next season, he may not. We know for sure that Gruden is out and Harbaugh is a 49er. Maybe Khalif "Holding ...Offense....#69.....10 yard penalty....repeat 2nd down" Barnes will earn his shot at the head coaching position before Gruden leaves ESPN in 2021. If The Raiders decide it's time for the annual demolition once again, my superstar coach would be Marc Trestman. This is why: No real super star will come to Oakland. He won't be on many other team's radar. He won games in Oakland and the Raiders love to #REHASH.

Runners Up for 2015 Coach:

Jim Fassel & Winston Moss

 



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